Queens, Kings, and Dastardly Things

• Monstrous Royals: Henry VIII v Louis VIV

  Who was history’s most monstrous monarch — Henry VIII of England or Louis XIV of France? Listen to find out!This week on Queens, Kings, and Dastardly Things, royal historian Robert Hardman and Professor Kate Williams sharpen their quills and their wits.Armed with the seven deadly sins as a scorecard, they put these two titans of royal misbehaviour through their paces. Pride? Henry struts about in padded sleeves and bans the middle classes from wearing fur. Louis builds Versailles — all 2,300 rooms of it — just so the Sun King can bask in his own reflection. Greed? Henry smashes up the monasteries and pockets the loot; Louis keeps ledgers in his pocket as if they were sweet wrappers. Lust? Both monarchs are formidable contenders — one leaves a trail of wives and mistresses (and the odd execution), the other an entire shadow dynasty of illegitimate children.From whale meat and beaver tails to an autopsy revealing a stomach three times the normal size, gluttony is not in short supply either. And when it comes to wrath, Henry’s temper ensures that being “close to the king” could mean being close to the executioner.It’s England versus France, Tudor versus Bourbon, axe versus wig — with laughs, learning, and a dash of horror along the way.And the royal rumble doesn’t stop here: next week it’s King John v Richard III, followed by Bloody Mary v Catherine de Medici.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Help! The Royals are Coming for Tea (2)

  From meat mountains to one lonely kiwi fruit — the royal appetites that shocked history. Listen Now!What’s worse than one demanding royal houseguest? A whole history of them — and in Part Two of Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things, Robert Hardman and Kate Williams dig even deeper into the guest lists from hell. From Henry VIII arriving with a thousand-strong entourage and an appetite for entire herds, to George IV’s ruinous dining habits (and total lack of return invites), to Louis XIV’s epic, toothless feasts, this is royal hospitality at its most exhausting.You’ll discover which monarch forced hosts to build entirely new buildings just to serve them tea, which biscuits owe their names to the royals (and which ones hid the Crown Jewels), and how a simple “drop-in” could strip a nobleman’s pantry bare for months. It’s a whirlwind of Tudor meat mountains, Regency excess, and the occasional sensible snack — such as the Princess Royal’s legendary one kiwi fruit.Expect tall tales, staggering menus, and a fair amount of sympathy for the poor souls who dared to open their doors. Whether you’d serve up a banquet or hide behind the curtains, this episode is your ultimate survival guide to entertaining history’s hungriest and haughtiest VIPs.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Help! The Royals are Coming for Tea (1)

  Royal visits gone wrong: the tantrums, the takings, and the tartest tongues in history.This week, Queens, Kings & Dastardly Things throws open the palace doors to a line-up of monarchs and princes who’ve turned “popping in for tea” into a full-scale ordeal. From Princess Margaret’s legendary put-downs (“How unfortunate”) to Queen Mary’s habit of going home with your best chairs, Robert Hardman and Kate Williams swap outrageous stories of royal visits gone deliciously wrong.You’ll hear about the Queen’s unexpected snowstorm stopover at a country pub, complete with Corgis demanding table service, and a Prince of Wales visit so badly timed the host hid in the loo thinking he was about to be arrested. Expect tantrums, tiaras, and the occasional singalong that ends in boos (yes, Francis Bacon, we’re looking at you).This is history served with gossip, wit, and a large slice of Dundee cake. So pull up a chair, pour yourself something strong, and prepare to meet the royals who could empty your pantry, ruffle your dignity, and leave you with a story you’ll be telling for decades.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Dragons & The Royals (2)

  Pull up a velvet throne and grab your alchemy kit – in this episode of Queens, Kings and Dastardly Things, Robert Hardman and Professor Kate Williams swirl together Arthurian legends, royal superstition, and some seriously dodgy medieval science. Listen now!Is the Holy Grail real? Can gold be made from stones? Did Diana really have a psychic on speed-dial? And why exactly did Queen Victoria try to give a clairvoyant a watch?From King Arthur’s suspiciously round table (equal rights, medieval-style!) to Queen Elizabeth I's astrologer with stage-magician energy – and a creepy sidekick who claims angelic permission to bed his boss’s wife – this episode dishes the royal gossip with a side of sorcery.Expect conjurers, clairvoyants, and chalices promising immortality. We meet John Dee, who mixed mathematics and magic (and questionable life choices), and peer into Queen Victoria’s séance-filled mourning rituals, featuring a moody Scottish manservant who may or may not be possessed by Prince Albert.And yes, we go full ghost story – haunted bedrooms and spectral jesters.History gets a magical makeover in this entertaining and insightful journey through fact, folklore, and the royal fondness for the utterly bizarre.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella Soames Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Dragons & The Royals (1)

  Welcome to the only podcast where royal scandal meets fire-breathing lizards. Listen Now!In this hilarious and history-soaked episode of Queens, Kings and Dastardly Things, Daily Mail columnist Robert Hardman and history wiz Professor Kate Williams team up to explore the very real roots behind the blood-soaked fantasy TV series Game of Thrones.You’ll learn:Why the dragons in GoT are basically airborne spitfires with scales.How Queen Cersei’s “walk of shame” was inspired by a real-life royal mistress who had a very awkward walk through London in her underwear.Why never to accept a dinner invitation from a Scottish nobleman in the 1400s—especially if a black bull’s head shows up on the table.And why Henry VIII’s Welsh dragon was the ultimate medieval hype beast.Oh, and if you're learning Welsh on Duolingo, you’ll finally understand why "I am a dragon" is one of the first things you’re taught.Packed with gory betrayals, royal revenge, scholarly banter, this episode proves once and for all: fantasy isn't that far from fact.Download. Then maybe don’t RSVP to any mysterious royal feasts for a while.Hosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesHosts: Robert Hardman and Professor Kate WilliamsSeries Producer: Ben DevlinProduction Manager: Vittoria Cecchini Executive Producer: Bella SoamesA Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular.Sign up to Palace Confidential, the FREE royals newsletter from the Mail's top experts. Delivered straight to your inbox every Thursday, it's the smartest way to stay in the royal inner circle. Just head to dailymail.co.uk/palaceconfidential to sign up today. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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